The Dress

As I sit and watch the Red Carpet at the Oscars, I listen not so intently to the interviews about the dreaded question directed at every woman: “Who are you wearing?!” The full body shot, the up and down motion of the camera, the shoe shot, the accessory shot. I don’t know about you, but i’m incredibly conflicted. I am a woman, I love pretty things, I love to feel feminine and sexy. You know what I love more? Feeling strong and empowered and smart and that my opinion matters to someone. I’ve grown up in an incredible time, a time where Supermodels have ruled the world so to speak. They’ve bombarded me my entire lifetime with magazines of beauty, movies with the sexiest of leading ladies, t.v. shows with the cutest girls around…you know what I say to that? Fu@k you.

We are women, incredibly sensitive emotional beings. Emotions that are so easily manipulated and toyed with, and that is exactly what Industry does. If you pay close attention to the ratio of commercials and advertisements, the amount directed at women and the amount directed at men – The amount of beauty products is mind blowing: hair, makeup, facial creams, fashion…the list is endless. Look younger, feel better, be the most beautiful you! Give me a break. They could give a rats ass about you feeling better about yourself so that you can be a solid contribution to society. If they actually cared about your self esteem and self worth they would tell you that your health is the most important factor of beauty. Inside and out. A healthy body, an ideal weight. Not manipulating your body into something that it isn’t. Not exercising your ass off solely for the intention of looking good for others. How about we try a different approach here? We have girls suffering from all kinds of eating disorders because they don’t feel good enough to wear a sexy dumbed down version of themselves. #NotBuyingIt

Although I do love makeup and fashion, I love being creative with myself and have many characters that I like to portray. I love beautiful things, beautiful fabrics and beautiful colors. I have worked a lifetime to feel like I wasn’t a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. To not just seem beautiful to other people and have a perfect outer layer, trying so desperately to be liked by an entire society. I’ve worked incredibly hard at erasing the unrealistic visuals in my mind that were so blatantly placed in front of me without any explanation since I was a child. I may not be there yet, but i’m well on my way to fully accepting myself to be a beautiful woman. One of true beauty. My health is of the utmost importance to me and I want to be strong – strong minded, strong body, strong spirit. My ten year old daughter deserves a healthy environment to grow in, one that she’s comfortable in. Comfort in her skin, comfort with her smile, her eyes, her hair. If I can teach her of her true beauty and self worth first, then I will feel that I have succeeded as a mother and as a woman.

I will continue to enjoy all things beautiful, but with a strength behind it and an opinion that I believe matters. So, my dream is that one day we’ll reach a point in our lives where no one gives a damn who you’re wearing! One day a woman will be valued for her incredible thoughts and opinions about whatever the Hell she chooses, without the incredibly superficial and lame question about a dress.